You Can #Quote Me On That! @NonnieJules @RRBC_Org @RRBC_RWISA @Tweets4RWISA #RRBC

JULY/AUGUST QUOTABLE:

Can you remember when three-way calling was the new big thing?  As children/teenagers, my daughters were not allowed to participate in three-way phone calls.  Knowing how young girls are, after having been one myself, I felt that was an open invitation for trouble.  Even in those situations, three was still a crowd in my mind, and I saw no reason why they should ever be in a phone conversation with more than one person at a time.

From what I’d heard from some of my friends regarding their daughters and three-way calling, those discussions always seemed to turn into ugly gossip fests, and my daughters were being raised on a strict “no gossiping” policy.  They were taught that if they ever found themselves in the company of those who were speaking negatively about others behind their backs, to excuse themselves from the group and walk away.  That way, the culprits would know that gossiping was not OK with them, and turning their backs on it, was their refusal to entertain it.  Mind you, as adults now, this is still how my daughters live their lives.

As a mature, out-spoken lady with years of wisdom under her belt, I choose to handle these situations differently.  My method doesn’t entail turning my back and walking away, although I stand by that as the route for my soft-spoken daughters.  I like to nip nonsense in the bud, meet it head on, and stare it straight in the eyes – so when I have found myself in similar situations, I’ve called those “messy” women out, publicly – in the presence of the people entertaining their nonsense.   I feel this is the only way to get gossips to stop.

If you have something to say about someone else, say it to them directly.  Pick up the phone, send them a text or an email, or better yet, say it directly to their faces.  Stop whispering behind people’s backs.  That makes you a coward.

There are some things in this world that we may not be able to stamp out as quickly as we’d like (i.e. racism, cancer, gun crimes), but for certain, I believe that we can end the cycle of gossip – all we have to do is refuse to entertain it – and we do that simply by excusing ourselves and walking away.  And although it might be considered childish, I hear sticking your fingers in your ears and loudly and repeatedly chanting “lalalalalalala,” is just as effective.  🙂

Each morning you open your eyes, vow to work hard at being a better person.

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